Tag: fiction

The Count of Monte Cristo

And now, the plot

Or,
Edmond Dantes; If God didn’t want me to do this he’d have killed me by now

It might actually take me a few posts to simplify the plot because The Count Of Monte Cristo is, in actuality, several interweaving stories

Part 1: The book versus films

Whom we must be revenged upon:
Mercedes; Edmond’s betrothed who panic marries his rival
Fernand; Edmond’s love rival for Mercedes who posts the allegations against Edmond which lead to his imprisonment

Most films emphasize this particular revenge and minimize the revenge on Villefort which is arguably the stupidest move. Genuinely. What happens to Villefort is so much more intricate and interesting. By focusing purely on the love story which is not the center of the novel these films do absolutely no justice to how fucked up Edmond Dantes is. A huge bummer.

Commonly in film: Mercedes’ son Albert is kidnapped and miraculously saved by the mysterious Count of Monte Cristo. The count uses Albert to be introduced into society. Mercedes is still in love with Dantes, recognizes him, explains that she needed to marry Fernand because Dantes had gotten her pregnant, after a duel with Fernand, they all run away together, lovers and bastard son. Hooray.

INCORRECT. Chronologically:

The mysterious Count of Monte Cristo buys a slave named Haidee. She is the daughter of a disgraced Vizier and former princess in a Grecian court of Arab descent.
She worships him as her savior and he does not treat her as a slave but as a ward, often bringing her to social events to show off her beauty (allegedly)

Monte Cristo indeed arranges for Albert to be kidnapped, Albert is really cool about it. By the time Albert leaves, all of the smugglers are shaking his hand and they’re all buddies. He calmly is like ‘oh cool, you saved me? You didn’t need to but that’s chill of you. Let’s be best friends’ and Monte Cristo is like yeah sure.

Monte Cristo avoids Mercedes at all costs and is weird about Albert being like ‘man my mom is cool. You wanna meet my mom? I’d fuck my mom if we weren’t related’

Monte Cristo keeps introducing Albert to Haidee saying ‘man, she’s the best. Isn’t she great? Wouldn’t it suck if she had a tragic past related to your dad? Definitely not a past linked to me. Your dad does fucked up shit a lot. Didn’t your dad used to work for a Vizier in Greece when he was a sailor before he became super mega rich for no reason. Anyway, check out my hot daughter. Hope you don’t fall in love with her’

And Albert’s like ‘my mom is cool’. And Monte Cristo is like ‘yeah, yeah she’s great, shut up’.

Eventually it becomes unavoidable and Monte Cristo and Mercedes meet.
Mercedes is still in love with Dantes, is the only one to recognize him, explains that she needed to marry Fernand because she didn’t know what else to do and has lived basically in mourning her whole life having chronic nightmares of Edmond’s reported death. She and Fernand have a loveless relationship that both tolerate. Their son, however, kicks ass and is the only thing Mercedes likes about being alive.
Albert agrees he’s Great. And also check out how cool my mom is. Monte Cristo is like yeah that’s nice, kid.

Eventually through repeatedly introducing Haidee and Albert, Monte Cristo is like ‘hey, tell this kid your tragic backstory but leave out names’. Haidee tells about her father being murdered and she and her mother being sold into slavery and a bunch of horrible shit that happened to her because Fernand sold the family out to be made a rich baron.

Albert and Monte Cristo get in a fight about Fernand after some intermediaries confirm that Fernand was the one who let to Haidee’s enslavement and orphaning. Fernand is like ‘this is really fucked up of my dad, but you shouldn’t say that in public’ and Monte cristo says ‘idgaf, he did it and I will talk about it’
They call for a duel.

Mercedes begs Edmond not to kill her son, Edmond agrees but knows he will have to let Albert kill him to maintain all of his lies, and laments still loving Mercedes as the worst thing about himself. And then he’s kind of like ‘or do I? She seemed cool about me letting her kid kill me. Yeah, fuck her actually’.

Then, at the start of the duel Albert mysteriously says ‘Actually I’m not offended’ and Edmond realizes Mercedes must have confessed everything.

Albert calls out his father about being a piece of shit so hard that Fernand kills himself and Albert and Mercedes leave town to start new lives.

Everyone agrees how cool Albert is. Mercedes ages rapidly, like rapidly, from being all disgraced and what not. Monte Cristo says ‘yeah, that sucks, man. Guess I’m revenged since Fernand is dead’.

Monte Cristo and Haidee realize they’re the only people who get each other, because of all the wanting revenge, and run away together. Monte Cristo is on a boat with Haidee, sailing away like ‘wow. What a messed up time I’ve had.’

Now that alone could be one book. But it’s not! Because we have other people to hate and plot against…

Ah,
The tale of young lovers, divided by a wall, speaking through a niche to one another, taking into confidence those that contrive to have the sweet lady fake her death using a mysterious poison; the lad misunderstanding then attempts his life—I am of course talking about the Count of Monte Cristo.

Prepare to be subjected to several weeks on The Count of Monte Cristo, the book that is actually several books and one diatribe on the belief that Lord Byron was actually a vampire, which I read out of spite.

At 1400 pages it may be the longest book I’ve read.

Last Meals: transcript for Goethe research

Link to the video essay: https://youtu.be/7m0oJRAywZ4

Transcript and Sources:

My choice of a last meal used to be enchiladas and negro modello, bottle wrapped in a wet paper towel and frozen, based on a dinner I had on a vacation where my partner and I went to random places around the country on an aimless week long road trip.
But that doesn’t feel right anymore. I had been researching the idea of last meals for a short story, a fact I’m going to mention again in this video because I made this out of order, haha, and I think I need an update. Something more me now and less me in my 20s.
That meal doesn’t have the connotations it used to.

When my great grandfather came to the United States he came with a copy of Dante’s Inferno and it wasn’t until I started researching last meals that I realized Faust has the same level of cultural relevance and importance to Germans that Dante has to Italians. I mean, most of our popular ideas of hell come from Dante’s Inferno, not Christian doctrine, and Faust has just as much significance.

A quick tour for those not familiar with Doctor Faustus and the many versions of his tragedy, most popularly I’m going into site Goethe’s Faust; Faust is a protagonist of the German legend based on the historical Johanna Georg Faust.

The general jist is that Faust, an academic and narcissistic man, becomes dissatisfied and depressed, and after an attempt on his own life, he calls on the Devil to make a bargain–hence the term Faustian. Mephistopheles, a demon, appears, and makes a bargain with Faust for knowledge and pleasure in exchange for his soul.

The historical Faust was an alchemist, magician, and scholar of the German Renaissance, born sometime in the mid 1400s, there’s some discrepancy on when. There’s scattered mention of him in first hand sources for the next hundred years, often performing magical acts or giving horoscopes to important officials and royals, only to be banished for being a freaky mystic. He is thought to have died in 1540 or 1541 as the result of an explosion in his alchemical lab. There are many written works in the early 1500s ascribed to Doctor Faust, detailing magical incantation, some of them falsely ascribed to being written during his lifetime.

Goethe’s Faust has a romantic bent and proclaims that Faust gained his metaphysical and esoteric knowledge from the aforementioned deal with the devil. But the story is, in a way, truly about Gretchen.

Gretchen is also based on a historical figure, Susanna Margaretha Brandt, a woman who famously convicted of and executed for infanticide, claiming that she was under demonic possession. She had been drugged and raped, conceiving the child, then got rid of it once it was born. Goethe was familiar with Brandt as several friends and family members were directly involved in her court case and the young Goethe lived in very close proximity to her. He worked her story into the story of Faust, saying that the principal reason she Was led astray was by Faust, selfishly pursuing carnal and secular pleasures, and that while both were temped by Mephistopheles, Gretchen is the character whom repents and is therefore absolved.

The historical Susanna Margaretha Brandt has a famous last meal, which she refused and instead only drank water, giving the meal to the guards.

Out of kindness, the guards then lied to her, saying her head would not be impaled after her execution, but she was beheaded and gibbeted to serve as a deterrent.

In the story by Goethe, this young woman he was familiar with was vindicated and allowed into heaven for turning away the selfish, depressive, and miserable Faust and shunning bargains with him a Mephistopheles when she could have evaded her fate, she chose to face it. For the real Susanna Margaretha Brandt, however, she suffered a brutal death at the hands of men, because of the actions of men.


Access Esoteric Works Attributed to Johann Georg Faust at:

https://books.google.com/books?id=ESpXAAAAcAAJ&pg=PA7#v=onepage&q&f=false

https://archive.org/details/bub_gb_v-tXAAAAYAAJ/page/154/mode/1up?view=theater

Das Kloster (full title Das Kloster. Weltlich und geistlich. Meist aus der ältern deutschen Volks-, Wunder-, Curiositäten-, und vorzugsweise komischen Literatur ) is a collection of magical and occult texts, fairy tales and legends of the German Renaissance compiled by Stuttgart antiquarian Johann Scheible in 12 volumes, 1845-1849. Vols. 3, 5 and 11 are dedicated to the Faust Legend.

Review: Yellowface

I was thinking about what I could do for my last review of the spooky season and I thought “Did I talk about ‘Yellowface’ yet?” I went back and checked. I haven’t. I need to.

Yellowface by RF Kuang is not billed as a horror story exactly.

It is horror, I would argue. The ‘satirical novel’ (read:horror) takes a deep dive into the publishing industry, white privilege, racism, the persecution complex of white authors, the dismissive attitudes toward Asian voices, the tokenism and more in a way that is so educational, so detailed, as to be exhaustive.

It follows a white woman who, deeply jealous and entitled, steals her successful Asian friend’s manuscript after her death and publishes it. It examines the lengths to which this white woman goes, publishing under a misleadingly Asian sounding name, claiming that anyone can write any topic with her own touch of persecution, justifying her theft by claiming her research into being able to edit the novel makes her an expert, having a sensitivity reader fired, dealing with the deceased’s family and friends, destroying evidence, and turning up in Asian cultural centers trying to promote “her” writing.

As it all unravels, the novel is full of suspense and agitation. And I just have to say….have you ever read a novel and thought, ‘The author thinks about this all of the time.’ Not ‘the author thinks about this all of the time because obviously she wrote a book about it’ but ‘the author has had this fear and idea curling in the back of her skull for at least a decade, and it is a privilege I have not to have thought about it’? That’s the tone of Yellowface.

Never Whistle At Night

As always when I read any collection of short stories there are particular ones which catch my attention, but I really can’t stress how much I enjoyed ‘Never Whistle at Night’. The collection is extremely well put together, spanning a variety of topics impacting indigenous communities, whether that be indigenous folk lore inspired, inspired by racism, classism, internalized trauma, religious trauma, or all of the above and of course more. The cultural weight of each story has its place in the anthology.

The editors deserve all the credit in the world, it’s a wonderful collection. Please support them.

Review: Poison for Breakfast



I would call it atmospheric.

The atmosphere is both circular logic and literary nonsense, in the tradition of Lewis Carroll’s nonsense and not the dismissive way which we say ‘nonsense’ casually.
Poison for Breakfast is not a novel. It’s a meditation on the nature of storytelling in the guise of a story.


Sort of, kind of, ‘Poison for Breakfast’ is about consuming poison and trying to work backwards to figure out how you’d gotten to the point of being poisoned. Snicket is given a note informing him that he has been poisoned and now he, as a reliably known mystery solver, must solve the mystery of this suddenly appeared note, his poisoning, and therefore his apparent murder.


He doesn’t actually tell you very much at all, buried in convoluted Lemony Snicket-ism upon Lemony Snicket-ism, meditating on the nature of storytelling. He tells various non sequiturs that he initially frames as action then admits are really just things he’s thinking about but that probably did occur at some point and therefore are still true.


Handler, as Snicket of course, talks about the nature of story structure, the importance of inspiring bewilderment, what details are and are not important to include, and the need to cause the reader to buy in to the side of the narrator. At one juncture he tells a story of a bad lesson given by an ornery writer which sounded remarkably familiar and which I paused in reading and laughed…. because I read that book this year.


Handler, as Snicket, talks about the evolution of writing advice as well, his ideas of the rules of writing changing in real time as he discusses Lemony Snicket moving about his fictional morning uncovering his potential imminent death and therefore murder.


He also very, very carefully discusses various ways to make eggs—a nod, I’d say, to the rule Lemony Snicket gives that you should only tell information relevant to the story. Handler, as Snicket, tells you many, many irrelevant things in the course of telling you the story, the story where he may presumably die at the end, without sharing other necessary information.


The true theme appears to be rules and breaking them.
Like cracking many eggs.


It is also a meditation on safety. The way in which safety can be so suddenly and irreversibly taken out from under us, “we have poisoned ourselves”.


We read to identify with bewilderment, explore our bewilderment, and we throw ourselves into imagination to find solutions to our bewilderment.


I encourage you to read this short, under 200 pages, meta narrative disguised writing advice. Slowly.


It’s in many ways life advice, too.

Robert Louis Stevenson

If “You take the boat at San Francisco, and then my place is the second to the left” sounds at all similar to “second to the right and straight on till morning”, it could be because the latter was written by JM Barrie as the instructions to Never-neverland, and the former was the instructions Robert Louis Stevenson wrote to Barrie while trying to coax him to visit Stevenson in Samoa.


Robert Louis Stevenson initiated a correspondence with JM Barrie, which some infer inspired a number of themes in Barrie’s masterpiece Peter Pan. By that time, however, Stevenson was already an accomplished, established literary force having published Treasure Island. His interest in Barrie seems to have been perfectly friendly and admiring, as he was the much more famous of the two at the time and had nothing to be cloying about.


Stevenson had initially reached out to Barrie and Barrie in turn smothered Stevenson with adoration. They frequently plotted meeting but Barrie’s devotion to his ill mother kept him from heading to Samoa, and Stevenson’s poor health (which initiated his move from Scotland in the first place) prevented him from visiting Barrie.


They never, technically, met.


Barrie often fantasized in his letters that they were secretly related in some way, stemming from the same ancient clans in Scotland, and now-infamously wrote in his letters “To be blunt I have discovered (have suspected it for some time) that I love you, and if you had been a woman ….” A sentence which Barrie did not finish.
The confession didn’t impact their correspondences negatively at all and they continued to be pen pals until Stevenson’s death. Stevenson’s half of their correspondences were published posthumously by Barrie. At the time Barrie suspected that his letters to Stevenson had been destroyed and that his half of their relationship would remain a secret.


Dr. Michael Shaw, a scholar in Scottish literature who discovered the ‘lost’ Barrie letters, published “A Friendship in Letters”. He notes the impact Stevenson had on Barrie and his development of Peter Pan, not just in his references to Treasure Island in script but allusions directly to Stevenson and their correspondences.
Stevenson, like Peter Pan, was the proverbial outsider to English society.


First, Scottish. Bad start to get ahead in England.
Robert Louis Stevenson grew up ill, often bullied, rebelling intensely against the strict Presbyterian upbringing of his parents who once regarded him and themselves as failures after Stevenson was found to be an atheist and participating in socialist societies. Stevenson was a conservative later in life and never fully reconciled his conflicting beliefs or his conflicting religious and irreligious beliefs.


Much of Stevenson’s mercurial fight with morality and political allegiance seems to be mirrored in arguably his seminal work, “Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde”.
The most annoying thing that comes with talking about Dr Jekyll and Mr.Hyde, personally, is when people allege that the potion which Dr. Jekyll takes transforms him into Hyde. Perhaps I’m being pedantic, but the literary theme of Jekyll and Hyde is that they are one in the same man, that the potion gives Jekyll permission to be Hyde, not that Hyde is an invention of some drug. Hyde is the invention of Jekyll. He is, already, wicked.


The Body Snatcher, a short story inspired by Burke and Hare’s crimes which were contemporary to it’s publication, follows a man employed by a surgeon to procure bodies who comes to suspect that his partner is supplying bodies in more ways than one. Again and again, Fettes is talked out of implicating MacFarlane in any of the suspected murders and keeps his silence.


Kidnapped, which details the young, orphaned David Balfour discovering that he may be the rightful heir to an estate, with his uncle promising to explain the story of his father to him in the morning, only to arrange for Balfour to be kidnapped with the intention to be sold into slavery in the Carolinas that night. Much as with Jekyll and Hyde and with the Body Snatcher, ‘what is moral’ is the central theme. Balfour is concerned primarily with pursuing his version of justice against his uncle and nothing else, namely, getting his inheritance.


He doesn’t even want to kill the guy for selling him into slavery. When they finally trick Uncle Ebenezer into admitting he arranged for Balfour to be sold, Balfour immediately uses it to blackmail him and receive a salary to be paid so long as Uncle Ebenezer lives.


Stevenson’s characters, overall, are not concerned with morality but with the pursuit of a personal goal. Jekyll seeks permission to be Hyde and experience the immortality that he denies himself; Fettes is complicit in multiple murders to assure his own financial stability; Balfour doesn’t seem to care about anything except getting his money.


Literary critic Leslie Fiedler refers to Stevenson’s heroes as “the Beloved Scoundrel”, characters to which personal justice is the only morality.


Which brings us at last to Long John Silver.


Barrie quipped that the only man Long John Silver feared was Captain Hook and often intimated that Peter Pan took place in the same literary world as Treasure Island.


Greatly impacting the modern image of a pirate, Long John Silver is technically the main antagonist of Treasure Island. I say ‘technically’ because Long John Silver is genuinely fond of Jim Hawkins and based on Stevenson’s mentor William Ernest Henley (Henley’s daughter, Margaret, influenced Barrie to use the name ‘Wendy’ in Peter Pan.)


Like many of Stevenson’s characters, Long John Silver has a great deal of duality. He is charismatic, hardworking, likeable, and gradually revealed to be a villain as well–his earlier qualities aren’t fully negated by his conspiring.


Much of Stevenson’s work asks the reader if they’re able to forgive or find likeable someone who does wicked things if it’s also true that they are not wicked all of the time.


Whatever that makes you think of Stevenson, he puts back on you.

Review: Remarkably Bright Creatures

The debut novel from Shelby Van Pelt, I’d seen an article talking about Remarkably Bright Creatures shortly after it was published , talking about the unexpected nature of the book and how it had come together. It was stuck like a burr in the back of my hair, something to look out for.

I had forgotten about it for a bit so when I had the opportunity to read it, it was a surprise. Like finding a missing key.

How appropriate, then, that the whole novel centers around small discoveries and their importance, finding things lost you’d not known were missing.

I found the book a bit slow at times, I had thought. Then I checked my tracking app and found I’d read it in two days. I thought it had been longer, and in part that’s because of how immersive the characterization and set description is.

Carefully crafted and laid, the book is lovingly written with characters that come alive, even those that go from obnoxious to well rounded through the course of the narrative. All of this is punctuated with a Greek chorus of Marcellus, an octopus, describing events as he witnesses them from his tank at the aquarium where many of the human characters lives intersect.

The book is charming, and despite seeming simple at it’s outset it was incredibly sentimental and sweet.

Review: The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue

I am a known sucker for deals with the devil. Anyone who’s read one of my manuscripts can guess at that. The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by VE Schwab was a recommended read that dropped in my lap, generated by an algorithm that I don’t usually pay attention to, but I decided to read it completely blind with all the spirit of why not, and it may be my first contender for favorite book of the year.

It originally came out in 2020 and I feel already late to the party of people who already know that this book is amazing, this book has a purposeful and distinctly timeless quality.

I found the pacing, character development, and flow of the story to be beautifully drawn out and balanced, shifting between scenes from the past and scenes from the present in 2014. The flow of story is important because it is reminiscent of the story’s crux, known as the darkness or Luc with whom Addie has made a deal for her soul. In her plea for time and freedom she has inadvertently rendered herself unable to leave a mark on the world around her, walking for eternity. Addie comments that Luc had initially been short, in her imagination, for Lucien but now apparently Lucifer. There is an elegant, flowing, consuming quality to the prose that mirrors its antagonistic presence well.

Ultimately, though, the most compelling nature of the book is that Addie herself is indomitable. At no point does she surrender, as Luc keeps seeking, and even in the end she is scheming her way to independence and survival. The love story that intertwines is practical in many ways while still romantic.

At 444 pages, it was a methodical, visually descriptive read and I would absolutely encourage you to seek it out.